You are enough

Could it be true? Could you really be enough? Could there really be, at your core, nothing wrong with you?

Most of us spend our entire lives trying to prove to the world that we’re worthy. That we’re alright. Our entire culture is built on external metrics of validation: how much money we have, how pretty we are, where we live, whatever. But today I would like to invite you to consider an alternative: that no matter who you are, what you have, or what you look like, you are enough. Beyond all external measures, and beyond any idea you have about yourself, you don’t need to be anybody other than who you already are.

I spent a lot of time in my first 29 years trying to cement my enough-ness to the rest of the world. I got a good job out of college, I gained a following online, I made some money, I took pretty pictures in pretty places. I was even on the Ellen DeGeneres Show (sorry to flex)! But in a tale as old as time, I realized it wasn’t enough. I was still trying to fill the same void in my soul. Still making the same mistakes. Still feeling unfulfilled.

This year, I started working with a woman who has helped me identify a lot of limiting beliefs and wounds I’ve been holding on to. I’ve looked at why I’m so desperate to show the world that I’m good, that I’m worthy. And the reason is, that deep down, I, like so many others, don’t really believe that I am. I’ve taken the insidious lie that our society is built on, that I need to improve myself with things, with accomplishments, and I’ve believed it.

Of course, it’s completely subconscious, and it’s no one’s fault. Look around at the world. Everyone is caught up in the same drama. Why else would there be such a struggle for power, such a struggle for wealth and control? Do you think if people felt good in their own skin, if they felt whole inside, that they would be starting wars or trying to build cities of gold or trying to gain a million followers or whatever else people are doing these days? No. The truth is that once you come to a place of deep acceptance for yourself, once you find a deeper peace within, you don’t need those things so much. They fall away on their own.

Do you still strive to do your best? Yes. Do you still have hopes and dreams? Yes. But you don’t get so lost in the pursuit of worldly things that you lose your mind, as many of us have done. You don’t go around accepting the bare minimum in your relationships and your life in the hopes that someone will make you feel like you have a shred of worth. You recognize your inherent worthiness and your life flows naturally from there.

So today I am inviting you to let go of the idea that you’re not good enough. Let go of the idea that you’re bad, that you’re unworthy of love, that there’s something wrong with you. Most of us who believe these things believe them on such a deep level that it’s not as simple as just saying, “yes, okay, that’s fine and dandy, I am good enough, thanks!” For most of us, myself included, it will take much longer. It will take a constant remembering of our innate goodness. And if you’ve been carrying around the heavy weight of unworthiness your whole life, it’s going to take some time to shift into a new state of being. But we’ve all got to start somewhere. Don’t be hard on yourself if seeing yourself with love and compassion doesn’t come easy at first. For most of us, it is our life’s work.

And we can start that work today! If you’re ready, why not start seeing the good in yourself going forward! Right here, right now, you are enough. Just sit with that idea for a little. Say it to yourself. “I am enough.” How does it feel? Does your mind come up with a million excuses as to why it’s not true? That’s okay. Rome wasn’t built in a day. When you are ready, the day will come when you’re ready to give up the idea that there’s something wrong with you. It doesn’t have to be today. It might not be any time soon. But you’ll get there. We all will, I know it. Trust in that, and until then, don’t be too hard on yourself. We’re all just humans, after all!